*What follows is an opinion based statement.
Shaving my legs on stage was not 'plan A.'
I originally had another, more subdued, idea for my fireside chat but decided to change it at the last minute. Why? Because I had the wonderful experience of being told, again, by a man what I needed to do to be attractive. One of these 'requirements' was to be clean shaven, and so I decided to oblige.
We have reached a strange time in society with the expectations of women. While we have been trying to reject the constraints of the past new ways of putting people into generalized boxes have emerged. There are so many online 'resources' detailing out how to be visually acceptable to society and they have begun to conflict. We are stuck between differing visions of the overall 'ideal woman.' The problem is this does not exist.
I wanted to communicate two main ideas in my presentation. First, that the expectation of women's appearances are lofty and draining. The idea that all women have time to constantly have perfect hair, makeup, fitness, and not hair an inch of body hair is unrealistic and damaging. We are human beings and we are not here as a gender solely to put all our effort into being judged on a sliding scale that often isn't our own. Secondly, I wanted to communicate that these things are choices and should not be dictated either way. I would never tell the world of women they need to stop shaving or wearing makeup. These things are sometimes things we do have time for and want to participate in. I definitely shave my legs, at home and on stage. The idea isn't that we shouldn't do these things, its that it should be a personal choice based on who that woman is. I prefer less makeup and to be clean shaven, because this is how I feel most confident. If another woman feels confident wearing a lot of ostentatious makeup and never shaving, then she has succeeded because the hope is that every woman can find a state where they feel comfortable and confident. This is what matters, not societies perceived standard of appearance.
So whether there are enough hours in the day to look perfect or not, it should be a personal decision not a general rule. While the opinions of others fall short in many ways, the idea that we can have these constraints assigned to us all so generally, and that we do these things to be attractive for men, are what I consider the most harmful. Preferences are okay, Sharing those opinions as rules or facts for all, is not.
I am glad to have been afforded the opportunity to express my opinion in a safe environment. I felt I could put myself out there in a somewhat vulnerable way and come out of the experience empowered. I am additionally glad for the opportunity to hear my classmates passionate opinions. While I may not have agreed with all of them, discussion was prompted and ideas shared. This community feeling of sharing is a way for all of us to get to know each other on a deeper level and hear how each of us views life and our place in it.
